Stephanie is an inconsistent perfectionist, writer of rubbish, and mother of three. She likes words and suspects she might like sanity, but really has no way of knowing. She can be reasonable, but not often. She’s got issues, and this is where she puts them.
Steph has been published on sites such as The Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, BLUNTmoms, The Indie Chicks, All4Women, Thought Catalog, The Motherish, and more. Her work can be found in the anthology Surviving Mental Illness Through Humor and in the Reverie Poetic Journal.
We Don't Chew Glass 
December 27th, 2013 at 6:05 pm
You had me at multiple personalities… but since that bit was at the very end… you almost didn’t have me… you’re welcome.
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December 27th, 2013 at 6:11 pm
A close one! I knew I should’ve put that at the top….
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January 19th, 2014 at 1:32 pm
Hey hey–can your snakes come eat my mice? Please?
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January 19th, 2014 at 1:36 pm
Oh, God, how I wish. I am willing to give you any snake you can find in or around my home – FOR FREE. Because that is just the kind of person I am.
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January 19th, 2014 at 5:18 pm
Giving is a good thing. I’ll reimburse you with a “house mouse.” The exterminator told me they have skulls made of cartilage, so they can crush their heads to squeeze through or under whatever they want.
Awesome.
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January 19th, 2014 at 5:26 pm
Eww! No need to send me any squishy mice, but thanks so much for offering. 😉
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January 20th, 2014 at 1:59 am
I came here by way of your FP’d piece…which is lovely, but not funny as hell…
Come to find out, YOU ARE FUNNY AS HELL!
I had to restrained myself from “liking” every F-ing post, because then I’d be a stalker and my “posts I like” widget would look, well just weird.
I can’t wait to wander about some more. :>
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January 20th, 2014 at 7:32 am
HA! Thanks, I try! That’s great. Now I’ll have to go stalk you a little. Or a lot. You never know with stalkers.
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January 20th, 2014 at 8:03 am
Stalk away, my friend, stalk away! :>
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January 20th, 2014 at 7:31 pm
You are contagious and I will not stop coming back. I laughed for over an hour as I got acquainted with your blog. Dare I say, your fabulously funny in a sadistic twisted way. Oh, the humor and sarcasm is beautifully poetic.
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January 21st, 2014 at 6:36 am
Yay! I’m so glad you got a good laugh. Thanks!
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January 21st, 2014 at 8:35 am
Stephanie, love your blog. Very refreshing!!! I too am a mother of three, wife of one and inconsistent perfectionist. I grew up with the real life Archie Bunker so brutal honesty, potty language, and foul language are not shocking. Thank you for the smile you put on my face! Have a great day!
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January 21st, 2014 at 8:42 am
Thanks Donna! Sounds like we have a lot in common – you put a smile on my face too!
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January 30th, 2014 at 10:38 pm
[…] “I have three children, against my better judgment. Also, one time I got talked into a pet lizard which had to eat crickets. Live crickets. We had a Cricket Escape (and by that I mean I accidentally dumped a bucket of crickets in the floor and walked away rather than try to catch them all) and our house still, two years later, has an inordinate amount of crickets. They are hiding in the walls copulating, I guess.” Steph […]
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January 31st, 2014 at 7:56 am
Group Therapy! Love it!
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March 4th, 2014 at 6:14 pm
[…] “I’m interesting, in the same way a car accident is interesting and you can’t look away.” Steph […]
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March 4th, 2014 at 7:05 pm
Yay!
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April 3rd, 2014 at 9:52 am
Thank you so much for following my blog 🙂
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April 3rd, 2014 at 10:50 am
Yeah! Thank you for writing it, lol. I’ve seen you around the WP world and had to know more. (I’m nosy like that.)
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April 3rd, 2014 at 10:55 am
Ha, I hope in a good way…lol Welcome
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April 3rd, 2014 at 2:40 pm
[…] 28 March 2014: “…my boss…wait for it…apparently thinks I am harboring the devil in my home.” –Steph […]
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April 3rd, 2014 at 4:31 pm
Dear God. I’ve never been more proud.
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April 5th, 2014 at 9:52 am
I know just what you mean. I think of my blog as semi-anonymous and am always trying to remember what I’ve shared versus what I’ve kept private.
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April 5th, 2014 at 10:45 am
Yep. I struggle with not wanting to offend people who know me in “real life” versus writing what I want. I live in a really small town and I always worry that my kids will be judged for my words. *Sigh* Being inappropriate and forgetful is so hard sometimes!
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April 5th, 2014 at 10:47 am
And once the info is out there, it can’t be pulled back.
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April 5th, 2014 at 10:51 am
Erg, I know it. I’ll have to save all the really juicy stuff for my book, lol!
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August 6th, 2014 at 6:21 pm
I’ve nominated you for a Liebster Award!
Check it out here: http://wp.me/p374p6-1pT
And here, because I had to make it complicated: http://wp.me/p374p6-1dI
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August 6th, 2014 at 6:36 pm
Thanks so much!
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August 12th, 2014 at 1:02 pm
[…] Steph, from We Don’t Chew Glass, approaches this topic from a view I haven’t seen from anyone else. She approaches it as herself, explaining her story, and how Robin Williams ties into it. She doesn’t make it all about him to get views. She doesn’t act like the end is coming because of his death. She expresses true sadness over his loss, for her own reasons. She’s not another ‘trend’. […]
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November 4th, 2014 at 10:12 am
You have been nominated for a Lovely Blog Award! =)
http://theartofbeingahuman.wordpress.com/2014/11/04/one-lovely-blog-award/
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November 4th, 2014 at 5:23 pm
Thank you so much!
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December 8th, 2014 at 6:35 am
Hilarious blog! It is either me finding the smallest of things funny or your sense of humor is amazing because I am looking at your category names now and trying not to laugh.
Maybe it’s the foul language?
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November 21st, 2015 at 5:39 pm
I don’t know why I’m just now seeing this, but I bet it’s the foul language. 🙂
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March 14th, 2015 at 7:50 pm
Herewith the constant validation that you seek….I just nominated you for the Versatile Bloggers Award – I always get a laugh out of your blog!
See the link below for details…
https://therecurrentlyhopeful.wordpress.com/2015/03/15/the-versatile-blogger-award/
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March 17th, 2015 at 7:29 pm
Aw! Thank you!
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September 2nd, 2015 at 6:25 pm
Haha i did the whole, secret identity too, everyone has code names except me now….
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November 21st, 2015 at 5:40 pm
It’s a pain, right? Eh. I’m too lazy and too forgetful!
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November 21st, 2015 at 6:42 pm
Yes! It is! I’m getting there though, I remember the more I use them!
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September 13th, 2015 at 11:37 am
Quite possibly the most honesty I’ve read on a blog. From a Mom of 4, (one deceased) Grandmother of 4, Auntie to… sheesh, I lost count at 25, Sister-in-law to 7, Sister to 7, Cousin… oh good grief, why count? Just wave your hand over several states in the US.
Keep it up. Moms like you are rare and real. And much loved. You give this 55- wait- 56-year old grandma some hope. There’s still hope.
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November 21st, 2015 at 5:41 pm
Aw, thank you! You are very kind. ❤
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December 20th, 2015 at 11:52 am
I have tried to keep my identity quiet too, but then I realise that people in real life know about the stuff I’m writing… confusing! lol
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December 25th, 2015 at 10:28 am
It was definitely too much for me. Some bloggers are really successful at it, but not this one, lol.
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April 12th, 2016 at 8:13 am
I think that I have just found my second home and I cannot wait to get to know my new people. Thanks for putting the welcome mat out. Next time I’ll bring treats or wine or a straight jacket, just let me know …
Linda K
@_theheadcabbage from
Tales from the Cabbage Patch
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April 14th, 2016 at 7:58 am
Awesome! Probably going to need all three! 🙂
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July 29th, 2016 at 3:56 pm
Hi Stephanie,
I’d love to talk with you regarding a promotion of our Curve mobile application. We’d love for you to be a sponsor.
Is there an email I can best reach you at?
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July 29th, 2016 at 5:26 pm
Carissa, if you fill out the the form under the “contact” tab, it will go to my email. Thanks, Stephanie
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October 13th, 2017 at 1:52 pm
I needed to smile today and your “about” page has been awesome!
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November 16th, 2017 at 7:36 am
Thank you! I’m so glad. 🙂
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